TBHPTBHTH!

Some people teach their kids to say amusing things, like "I'm precocious!" (Okay, I just made that up and now secretly I'm all, ehramagerd I have to do that! Which says a lot about me, none of which is very good). Others work on teaching their babies to walk or do the splits. Me, I like to focus on blowing raspberries. 

Behold this video from this evening. We were goofing around in front of Photo Booth in an uninspired attempt to pass the last 20 minutes before Puffy's bedtime (we'd already read/eaten/attempted to destroy several fine books). 

I think she's got it! 

Goodnight, y'all. Oh and thanks, Bill Watterson, for a thousand things, one of which was teaching me how to spell TBHTHTPTHTH! 

AND SQUEEEEZE YOU FOREVER!

The weather has been nice and so I've been spending more time in the sunshine and less in front of the laptop. In fact, we're off to the Danube right now--but before we go, a quick post. 

This morning Alex was dressing Nava and said, "I am going to hug you and love you..."

and I added, "and squeeeeze you forever!"

We hadn't thought about Looney Tunes in YEARS, but I guess babies bring out everyone's inner Elmyra. 

P.S. Why is Looney Tunes spelled with an "e"? Weird. 

Happy Belated Mother's Day

On this my first Mother's Day, Alex was out of town with his father on business and not plying me with large diamonds or even toast and OJ, and it was pouring rain all day long, so the kid and I celebrated with the following festive activities: 

* Cleaning up misplaced animal poop (this is a recurring theme over here)

* Picking banana out of McNoodle's hair

* Trying (and failing) to unclog our bathroom sink using chemicals

* Trying (and failing) to unclog our bathroom sink using an old hanger

* Trying (and failing) to unclog our bathroom sink using force of will and swear words

PhotoBooth selfie! This symbolizes our relationship nicely.

* Giving up

* Following an extensive full-body fight with my infant daughter, cutting the fingernails on her right hand 

* Trying to do the left hand

* Failing

* Reading a children's book. And by reading I mean trying to read and show her the pictures, but not allow her to tear out the pages. This is educational in that it is teaching her to thwart me.

* Cutting her left thumb nail and pointer fingernail. 

* Cleaning up milk spilled on the couch

* Singing some nursery rhymes

* Brushing away many tears shed after McNoodle fell directly backwards from sitting position onto her head. Wondering how many times she can do this without causing damage.

* Practicing standing (Is this list boring for you? Not gonna lie, it isn't always riveting for me.)

* Noodle sits herself up successfully and directly in front of her toy, and congratulates herself by doing the Great Success! dance (both arms in the air, scream and slap the floor). My heart melts. All is right with the world. Wish Alex was here. 

* Things go wrong. I brush away more tears, this time shed in rage because we are not allowed to pull up the cables that are tacked around the perimeter of the living room floor NOR are we allowed to eat the dirt out of the potted plants NOR can we eat the candles NOR are we allowed to bang on Mommy's laptop or basically ever do anything really fun. And no, I can't pick you up and make your dinner at the same time. Life is cruel like that. 

* One more fingernail!

* Feeding the baby dinner. She did her thing where she screams and cries after every bite. I don't know why. This is a newish behaviour that is getting old very quickly. 

* Cleaning up food flung onto the floor/bookshelf/me. Where the f*** is Alex?

* Picking banana out of McNoodle's hair (one more time, with gusto!)

* Deciding to just give her a bath. It's something to do, right? Also, I will kill that man. 

* Last two fingernails. Yes! YES!! OMFG YESSS!

And so, a day late, I would like to thank my own mother from the bottom of my heart for having raised me without wringing my formerly tiny little neck. Mom, I love you. 

My mom, my daughter and I at Christmas. And a teddy bear. 

And to all of you women out there without babies, having very recently been one of you I know there ought to be an inclusive Women's Day for all of us. Let's work on that. Until that happens, to the moms, I hope you were properly celebrated, and if you weren't, that you properly celebrated your own self. To all of you with multiple children, and to all the single mommies, I bow in awe and would pick banana out of your hair any time. And to the Noodle--thanks for letting me get to be a mommy. I love you. 

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!