Ten thirty a.m., we're at the doctor's office for a routine check-up and meningitis vaccine.
The nurse and I put the Noodle on the scale. She's 9.1 kg (that's 20 lbs). The nurse measured her from top to toe (74 cm), and all around her head (47 cm).
Our conversation, though we held it in German, went more or less like this:
"Okay, that's it." the nurse said, after she'd entered the last measurement into the computer. "The doctor will be right in." She got up to leave.
"So, she's normal?" I asked.
"Hm? Oh yes. Everything's fine," the nurse said.
"But is she normal but kind of big? Or normal but kind of small?" I asked.
"She's perfectly healthy. Everything's fine," said the nurse. She took a step toward the door.
"Like, healthy but a little big, or okay but kind of small?" I asked.
"Totally healthy," she said with a warm smile.
"Oh, that's good," I said. "Thank you."
The nurse turned to go.
"So she's perfectly normal?" I can only wonder what my stupid face looked like.
Without rolling her eyes even once, the nurse went back to the computer. "Okay," she said. She sat down. She did not sigh. She put on her glasses and peered into the screen. "Your daughter's weight is in the 40th percentile for her age," said the nurse."Her height is in the 50th percentile. So. Pretty average."
"Wow," said I. "It really doesn't get averager than that."
The nurse stood up and smiled warmly. Again. "Well then, do you have any more questions?" She didn't even flinch when I started talking again.
"Um. It's just that I'm kind of big, and my husband's really tall, so do you think that maybe she's too small considering? I mean, I know it's probably nothing, but I'm not feeding her wrong or anything, right? Did she grow enough since last time? She was born so big. Is it normal for her to be so average now?" I asked.
"It really can be very different every time," she said. "Babies all grow at different paces. And don't worry about her diet. I'm sure if she was hungry she would let you know! The babies won't let you forget to feed them!" She laughed, to let me laugh.
"Ha ha," I said. "Of course. Ha...So she's not too little. Or too big."
"Not at all," said the nurse. "She's just right." And then she ran away.
And if that wonderful nurse breathed a sigh of relief when she left the room, I didn't hear it. What a hero. May she get a raise every six months forever.
P.S. The Noodle hasn't been to the doctor's since April but amazingly seems to remember that he pokes her with needles whenever she sees him and reacted accordingly, i.e. with deep suspicion and horror. You should have seen her little face wrinkle up when he came at her with a stethoscope. It was adorable. Who knew she has that kind of memory span already?
P.P.S. Obviously, she's totally fine. And normal. Abnormally normal, I tell you. And of course, we are deeply grateful for our healthy baby and I am grateful for our extraordinarily patient nurse.
P.P.P.S. Still no teeth - but we can see 'em. THISCLOSE.
The nurse and I put the Noodle on the scale. She's 9.1 kg (that's 20 lbs). The nurse measured her from top to toe (74 cm), and all around her head (47 cm).
Our conversation, though we held it in German, went more or less like this:
"Okay, that's it." the nurse said, after she'd entered the last measurement into the computer. "The doctor will be right in." She got up to leave.
"So, she's normal?" I asked.
"Hm? Oh yes. Everything's fine," the nurse said.
"But is she normal but kind of big? Or normal but kind of small?" I asked.
"She's perfectly healthy. Everything's fine," said the nurse. She took a step toward the door.
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| Alles im grünen Bereich. (Danke Mary fürs Foto :)) |
"Totally healthy," she said with a warm smile.
"Oh, that's good," I said. "Thank you."
The nurse turned to go.
"So she's perfectly normal?" I can only wonder what my stupid face looked like.
Without rolling her eyes even once, the nurse went back to the computer. "Okay," she said. She sat down. She did not sigh. She put on her glasses and peered into the screen. "Your daughter's weight is in the 40th percentile for her age," said the nurse."Her height is in the 50th percentile. So. Pretty average."
"Wow," said I. "It really doesn't get averager than that."
The nurse stood up and smiled warmly. Again. "Well then, do you have any more questions?" She didn't even flinch when I started talking again.
"Um. It's just that I'm kind of big, and my husband's really tall, so do you think that maybe she's too small considering? I mean, I know it's probably nothing, but I'm not feeding her wrong or anything, right? Did she grow enough since last time? She was born so big. Is it normal for her to be so average now?" I asked.
"It really can be very different every time," she said. "Babies all grow at different paces. And don't worry about her diet. I'm sure if she was hungry she would let you know! The babies won't let you forget to feed them!" She laughed, to let me laugh.
"Ha ha," I said. "Of course. Ha...So she's not too little. Or too big."
"Not at all," said the nurse. "She's just right." And then she ran away.
And if that wonderful nurse breathed a sigh of relief when she left the room, I didn't hear it. What a hero. May she get a raise every six months forever.
P.S. The Noodle hasn't been to the doctor's since April but amazingly seems to remember that he pokes her with needles whenever she sees him and reacted accordingly, i.e. with deep suspicion and horror. You should have seen her little face wrinkle up when he came at her with a stethoscope. It was adorable. Who knew she has that kind of memory span already?
P.P.S. Obviously, she's totally fine. And normal. Abnormally normal, I tell you. And of course, we are deeply grateful for our healthy baby and I am grateful for our extraordinarily patient nurse.
P.P.P.S. Still no teeth - but we can see 'em. THISCLOSE.
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