Salzburg: Ancient Home of Blond, Blue-Eyed Baby Jesus

Last weekend our little family headed out to Salzburg. Our mission was to show Nava to her great grandmother and a couple of Alex's wonderful cousins and their families, and to coo over another freshly baked baby girl named Floriana, who is an adorable porcelain princess with rosy cheeks and sweet blue eyes. 

Alex's Oma 

She is also blonde, because this is Salzburg. 

There are so many natural blonds in Salzburg that it is one of the last remaining homes of blond, blue-eyed Baby Jesus. Other places may have swapped His image for something a little less European, but Salzburg is old school like that. Blond Jesus (and his blond parents) have had their pictures carved, painted, frescoed, lacquered and cross-stitched all through the city. The traditions of Christendom are obvious in other ways - for example, I heard someone with no particularly religious leanings use "Christian" as a synonym for "civilized" (as in, "Why don't you call at a Christian time of night?"), which I've never heard in Vienna. 

Salzburg has just under 150,000 residents, and at least that many tourists wandering around day and night. The main reasons for the tourist boom are the architecture, the Mozart, and especially The Sound of Music, that great American classic, which no Austrian has ever seen but which everyone has heard of because tourists bring it up all the time. It was filmed in Salzburg. That scene where the Von Trapp family are hiding from the Nazis in a cemetery? Yeah, that's basically Alex's grandmother's backyard. 

St. Peter's Abbey. Don't let that 18th century dome fool you.
In the same century as this place was first used as a church,
Attila the Hun battled Rome, the Shaolin Monastery was founded
and Mayan civilization was enjoying its glory days. Sidenote:
The building on the right houses the oldest continuously running
restaurant in the world. "Genuine Salzburg hospitality for over 1200 years".

There is a part of Salzburg where young and dynamic people hang out, or so I'm told, but like most tourists I've never been there. I've only ever spent time in the the Altstadt, or old city, which radiates a stony coldness even on hot days. It also radiates conservatism and wealth, and many of the oldest (and most touristy) streets in town are filled with designer shops that have had a sort of Ye Olde Catholick Towne facelift. 

Alex's Oma lives in an area at the foot of an enormous rock called the Mönchsberg, atop which sits a properly medieval fortress. Around its base are chunky edifices and pathways that look like they were scraped into the mountain by monks who had nothing but wooden sporks to work with. Growing outward from the cliffside are cobblestone alleys lined with baroque-looking churches (and other buildings, but it feels like mostly churches) that hide truly antediluvian cellars in their bowels. 

Regular people in Salzburg

This city is old as they come. It was once a Celtic settlement, but in 15 B.C. the Romans took over. That city, Iuvavum, fell apart in the 5th century but was later reestablished as the bishopric of Salzburg in 696 A.D. by Saint Rupert, or so Wikipedia tells me. 

You want to know how old this place is? St. Peter's Abbey, in which Alex's grandmother resides, is the oldest known convent in the German-speaking realm and indeed it is SO OLD that when St. Rupert came through he had the place renovated. The core of the building and spire that exist today were built in the Middle Ages, but of course at that point the site had been used as a church for a good five hundred years already. Despite the sometimes kitschy renovations, there's a kind of Indiana Jones feel to Salzburg, like some crusader might have stashed the Holy Grail in what is now the basement of the local Prada. 

More regular people

And in such a place, I guess it shouldn't be THAT surprising that traditional Austrian dress is back. Alex and I were told that young, hip people across Salzburg can now be seen rocking their Dirndl and Lederhosen, like, all the time.  And to our utter amazement, it was true. In Vienna, if you wear such things others will assume you are either selling cheese at a farmer's market, attending a wedding, or have atrocious politics. (Which is too bad, really, because a good Dirndl gives every woman--flat, fat or otherwise--a lovely hourglass figure.) 


Anyway, in Salzburg wearing your Tracht (national dress) these days doesn't mean anything! It just means you're wearing clothes! I wish I had gotten a picture of the one guy who was wearing Lederhosen with a V-neck sweater and a slouchy beanie over his dreads, but you'll just have to take my word for it. However, I did manage to take photos of these other perfectly regular people wandering around in their Dirndl and Lederhosen without goose-stepping, getting married or carrying wheels of cheese. 

Sadly we had to leave Salt Castle after only one night. 

Spot the Austrian detailing at this crosswalk!
(I see one hat and at least two pairs of Lederhosen.)

And thus we abruptly find ourselves at home on the Gumpendorfer Strasse of the 21st century, where the Volk have assiduously hip tattoos, do hot yoga, drink gin, and dress like the Amish. It's good to be back around normal people. 

Pennsylvania Dutch Country or Gumpendorferstrasse? This photo shamelessly plundered
from this website: http://www.theinquiringmind.net/2008/10/peoples-of-america-amish.html